This morning I sit here in my living room that overlooks the forrest. The leaves are turning from green to yellow, orange and red. Sun beams are dancing through the leaves and illuminating the bright and vibrant colors all around. If you would have told me a year ago today I would be living in a cabin, on a mountain, in the woods, with abundant deer, a band of raccoons, a skunk and a crazy little bat.... I probably would have laughed at you.
I always thoughts that Sarah, Abrahams wife was a little bit of a naughty, cheeky lady... Laughing at God's promise... Not believing that the God of the Universe could give her a baby after years of being barren (Genises 18:10-15). Seriously, she laughed and doubted God's power and goodness... then lied about laughing? The nerve and sass! I used to always read that story and judge her lack of faith and her response to God's beautiful and hopeful promise.
Oh Sarah, how I get you now. I have seen God do things I never would have imagined possible. As surely as He gave you a son, He has done miracles for us too. His power and presence has left me in awe and wonder. My faith is stronger, my love for Him is deeper and I know that my limited understanding of His vast greatness and limitless power is never going to be able to fully comprehend the love He has for me, and the way He is capable of fighting for me, and how powerfully He can move. Genises 18:14a "Is anything too hard for the Lord?"
Last year, I took some time to think about my deepest longings, prayers and hopes, even dared to dream for the future. I wrote them all on a thick piece of cardboard in fancy letters praying over each individual thing as I carefully penned each letter. I put it up in my room and prayed over each thing on that list day and night. I called it my little prayer wall. I don't believe that that there is any sort of magic prayer formula to get what you want, BUT I do believe that God sees us in our brokeness, He hears the cries of our hearts and our intimate, honest and humble moments worshipping Him and crying out to Him. Those moments stir His heart. And that is a powerful thing. I believe that for years God heard Sarah weep, long and dream of what it would be like to be a mother, to know the love of a son, to hear joyful laughter, to hold a chubby little hand...to have a descendant. I believe He heard her prayers for years and years and saw her in her brokeness and longing, and then delighted in fulfilling His promise and lavishing His love on His beloved laughing Sarah.
As I prayed over my little list, from truly the depths of my heart, longing to see God move and show us His power, provision and love; something miraculous happened God began to move. He changed me. I let go of things I was holding on tight to and completely entrusted them to Him. That's when God Almighty began reveal His power and precious love for me in ways I couldn't even imagine. He began to bind up my brokeness and wounds, healing me, comforting me, growing my faith in Him. He lifted burdens off my shoulders that I have been under the weight of for five years. He healed my daughter, rescued my son. Freed me from deep bitterness and unforgiveness. Filled me with joy. Gave me confidence where I lacked. I desperately wanted to be more like Him and over time I saw Him uproot unhealthy things, and soften me, and fill me up with His fruit. Galatians 5:22 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self control." There is power in prayer, in a surrendered life, and an expectant faith.
I sit here this morning with a heart full. God has touched every single thing on my prayer list. Every prayer for Dox, for my husband, for my kids, for my own heart, for our home, our future... His fingerprints are on it all. There is power in prayer. If for even a moment you are wondering if God even cares. Let me assure you, HE DOES. He sees you, He hears you and He is moving in your life and all around you for your good. Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to his purpose."
As I sit here this morning, looking out at the forrest and remember how God brought us to this place. Our fixer upper is becoming our dream home. It is kind of the same with my heart. Where things were dead, I see life sprouting up again. Where there was great loss, He has blessed us abundantly. Seeing Him move so powerfully has me praying even more, not to see things go my way - but to see things go His way. His will be done is infinitely better then my will. It's my prayer for you too, that you would see His power moving in you and all around you. He longs to show you great and mighty things, to show His power, to fight for you, heal you, deepen your faith and lavish His great love on you. Don't wait another day, with an expectant faith, and open hands get on you knees trust King Jesus to move, wait for Him to move. He will.
I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in His holy people, and His incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at His right hand in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 1:18-20
