Time

   Time, time, sweet, precious time.  I either have too much of it on my hands or not enough, usually the latter. At this point in my life, time seems to be flying by. From what I hear, it slips away, faster and faster as the years go by. Time pulls at opposite ends of my heart in this season. I am desperate to keep it still and slow it down as I hold onto sweet moments with my kids as they grow. I try to soak up every cuddle, laugh and good teaching moment that I can. Those are the sweet moments that I pray will be etched in my mind forever. I also don't want to forget the tears, life lessons learned, and bumps and bruises along the way. Those moments are hard, but they are shaping my kids (and me too) and growing their character beautifully. If I had a remote for this life, I could fast forward the fits, potty training and the difficult seasons. But, if I skipped to all the perfect moments I would miss so much of the heart, so much of the growth, most of life. How handy would a rewind button be?! Relive all the dance parties, snuggled up quiet times, jokes and laughter? Brilliant! I could rewind and have moment re-do's in which I don't lose my temper, get impatient or can say the right thing the first time, that would be nice. But, life comes remote free- it is meant to be lived moment by moment, season by season. We are meant to make the most of it all, do our absolute best, learn from our mistakes, and be all the wiser. There is no way of stopping it or slowing time down, so I daily remind myself to make the most of every opportunity,  every gifted moment in time.
   
     There is a pull in the opposite direction for me as well. Sometimes, I just can't wait to be in a different season. I can get impatient and incontent while I wait on the Lord. There is SO much that I want to do, so many plans that I have, so much that I am passionate about, but God in His almighty wisdom and sovereignty has clearly said .... "Rachel, you wild child of mine, WAIT... this is not the season". I tend to be a little Marthaish. I am a doer. I think I can pile it on and conquer it all. And if the Lord had not graciously, gently but very clearly stopped me from doing more, I would probably be in a hot mess right now. He is good to me. He knows what I can handle and I am so thankful that He has protected me from myself and my tendency to do it all. The things that I want to do...OH they are SO good and I am so excited about them, and one day, when I get to serve in the ways my heart longs to it's gonna be SO good. God is using this time, the waiting period, to grow me, teach me and get me ready for what my heart is so passionate about. My maturity, wisdom, discernment and knowledge have had to catch up with my passion, and I am still working on it. There is so much that I want to do, and all good things, but I never want to live my life today just waiting for tomorrow. What God has given me to do today is infinitely more important than the plans that I have for the future. I pray that He will gently remind my heart of that truth every time it starts to wander. And may He generously give me His perspective and insight into His plans for me and my family, and His timing - and may I be patient enough to wait.
Proverbs 16:3

"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans."

Proverbs 19:21

"Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails."

      Sometimes, mainly in the mommy moments, it is easy for me to forget that time is a gift. You know, the sleepless nights, waking up to an overflowing sink and flooding bathroom (thank you Sunday), playing referee all day to fighting kids, cooking with kids (they think they are helping, but really they are just creating memories that we can laugh about tomorrow)...the endless messes, I mean endless... I clean a room, come back to it five minutes later and it looks like I had never been there in the first place... dishes, laundry, muddy footprints.... it never ends. It is in those moments, that I need to remind myself that life is not ever going to be perfect... I will regret it if I don't make this time, this day, this crazy life of mine count! The craziness and busyness of growing four kids in my house, is what I am going to miss most one day. Not to mention, it is the most important thing that I will ever do with my life. I want to take the time to raise them, love them, hold them and teach them right!    

 Time will come and go. But what we do with our time for eternity.... That will last forever.


Ecclesiastes 3:1-11


"There is a time for everything,

    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

²     a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
³     a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
⁴     a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
⁵     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
⁶     a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
⁷     a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
⁸     a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

⁹ What do workers gain from their toil? ¹⁰ I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race.¹¹ He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end."