I have been able to get a glimpse of what Moses must have felt when God's glory was revealed to him. The Lord has stooped down and been so merciful to us. Through these months of transition and uncertainty I pleaded with God to show us His glory, to bring beauty out of ashes. Oh how He has and in great abundance, leaving us overwhelmed beyond words. You would not believe all He has been doing and preparing for us over these months while we waited. It's astonishing, and has left no room for doubt that we are exactly where He wants us to be.
Exodus 33:17-19 "And the Lord said to Moses, "This very thing that you have spoken I will do, for you have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name." Moses said, "Please show me your glory." And he said, "I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name 'The Lord.' And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy."
I have been so humbled by God's goodness. I feel unworthy and undeserving of the seas He has parted, the storms He has stilled and the fish and loaves that He has multiplied in abundance. Who am I that He would lavish such love on me, pass by me, and let me see His glory?
A couple weeks ago the kids and I were driving home from school. They are still attending school in south Salem even though we live way across town as north as you can possibly get, so our commute is about a half an hour each way. The sun was peaking through clouds and spread over the beautiful orchards and pastures as we approached home, but when we looked at the horizon we could see a massive dark cloud in the distance. We pulled over because the contrast between the light and the darkness was breathtaking. As we parked on the gravel shoulder and rolled down all the windows the dark cloud split open and we could see rain pour out of if. We were still sitting in the light. Bright and warm rays of sun enveloped our surroundings, yet we could see the dark down pour just miles away. We all just sat there, in silence and amazement as we saw beams of light surround the cloud and radiate around it. It was glorious.
When I got home I poured over the book of Job. God had given us such a beautiful picture of His glory, even in the down pour, darkness and turmoil there His glory is; all consuming, ever present, completely surrounding and all encompassing. We were now on the other side looking back and we could see that He was indeed sovereign, His glorious light never left, He never left. But now we understood His power and His glory like we had never known it before.
I was in awe, who am I that the Great I Am, the Sovereign all powerful Lord would be mindful of me?
"Then the Lord answered Job out of the storm. He said..."Can you raise your voice to the clouds and cover yourself with a flood of water? Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Do they report to you, "Here we are"? Who endowed the heart with wisdom, or gave understanding to the mind? Who has the wisdom to count the clouds? Who can tip over the water jars of the heavens?" Then Job replied, "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted."
Job 38:1, 34-37 & 42:1-2
God did not forget us or abandon us. He was all the time working, preparing and unfolding His glorious plan for our lives. Here are just some of the ways God has been upholding us, providing for us and lavishing love on us...
-He provided for us through the hard work and dedication of our amazing accountant.
-My grandparents have provided a roof over our heads, a place of comfort and rest and beauty. They have loved us, prayed for us and supported us through every turn on this adventure, while providing for our families basic needs. How do you begin to say thank you for such great love?
-Family and friends have stood with us like an army, holding us up with prayer and the powerful Word of God daily as we waited for the Lord to lead us.
-Brothers and sisters in Christ have supported us financially and with mighty, powerful prayers throughout this part time season at Dox.
-We have been welcomed with such a deep, sweet and warm love to Doxology (Our new church in Corvallis, Oregon) that I can't even tell you. We don't even live there yet, but long to be there so deeply because of the love we have for that sweet bride and the love they have extended to us. When we are with them, it feels like home. It blesses me so much I can hardly even hold the tears back.
-God has provided our dream home for us. Can you even believe it? I can't! Our dream home! If all goes well we are set to close mid July. I want to live there forever. It needs a lot of love, but with time and love it will be everything my heart has ever longed for and prayed for my family. The way God provided for it was comparable to the Red sea being parted. He made a way where there was none. That house is His and always will be, we get to live there and love people in it.
I am in complete awe of how God Almighty is continuing to move mountains. The words of Job echo in my mind with gratitude and anticipation every day, "I know you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted."
It is mind blowing to me that the God of Moses and Job is also the One that claims me. He knows me by name and is doing miracles revealing His glory in tender and mighty ways every day. As I sit here right now, world halted so that God Almighty, King Jesus can pass by and reveal just a glimpse of His infinite glory to flawed, imperfect and undeserving me - My prayer is that His favor and all His goodness, grace and mercy would mark me, leaving me forever changed. That I would come down from the mountain with His glory reflecting from my face. That His praise would always be on my lips, overflowing from my life and ministering to others so that I will never forget all He has done. My greatest prayer is that I live each day with this knowledge not just in the forefront of my mind but that the truth of who God is would also infiltrate my whole being and reign in my heart governing who I am, how I love and how I live my little moments here until I get to be in His infinite glory forever.
